It’s day 15 of the 30 Day Restart Challenge, which means we’re halfway through!
I’m so glad I started this challenge because I’ve been able to practice two very important aspects of writing life: discipline and perseverance.
I’ve become more disciplined because this challenge asks me to show up to my writing every day. Whether I produce anything is another matter, but at least I opened my notebook, stared at the prompt, and picked up my pen with the intent of creating something. The BICHOK concept is very powerful, y’all.
Because I’ve shown up to my writing almost every day for the past two weeks, I’ve become more determined because hey, words are elusive little bastards sometimes and that means I have to strap on my bow and quiver and go a-huntin’. In this challenge, I’ve experienced a lot of creative pushback and I’ve stretched my muscles and shoved through.
The stuff I produce isn’t perfect; far from it. But, surprisingly, that doesn’t even bother me. I made it and to me, that’s beautiful. Over the 8 days I’ve produced something, I’ve written over 4,000 words. And that’s on top of the habits I’m learning.
Writing every day is hard and sometimes I don’t get to it, not because I don’t want to, but because I literally don’t have the time to make it happen. And that’s okay. I redouble my effort other days. I’m proud of myself for having gotten done as much as I did because these past two weeks, I’ve started a new job and had a cold. And I still showed up and put something on the page.
Today, I want to share with you the advice I wish I’d gotten when I was sixteen and struggling with my writing. By the time I was sixteen, I’d been writing for five years but didn’t feel any more confident in my writing than I did when I first started and I didn’t know how to get any better.
Here you are, sixteen-year-old Jean.
1) Take a closer look at your dialogue tags: avoid the inherently obvious ones
One thing that immediately screams amateur is this:
“Go right!” she bellowed.
“Right?” he repeated.
The dialogue tag “repeated” tells me that the writer isn’t paying enough attention to their words, because “repeated” in a dialogue tag is inherently redundant. At best, it slows down the reader because it’s dead weight. At worst, it shows the writer isn’t paying close enough attention to the words they use, and why should I, the reader, pay attention to your words if the writer isn’t?
In general, dialogue tags operate most effectively when used simply. Lean on the “invisible said” and consider carefully when deviating from it. Do you need to say they “shouted” if there’s an exclamation point at the end of the sentence? Do you have to emphasized that they “cried” if they’re wiping tears away?
Here’s author Laura Whitcomb on literal substitutes:
Screamed, cried, shouted, yelled, called, whispered, hissed, and laughed can work well if they are used literally. If a character screams a word, such as her child’s name, because she sees him about to run in front of a car, it might work. But if a character is simply annoyed at another character and screams, “I told you before, I can do it myself!” it will probably come across as bad writing. Remember to be frugal with said substitutes. Don’t overuse them or you’ll slow down the story.
Your First Novel by Ann Rittenberg and Laura Whitcomb
This is where “show, don’t tell” actually comes in handy, because you can usually replace a non-said dialogue tag with a description that conveys the same information more deeply and smoothly.
2) Dialogue tags, cont.: try an adverb or two
I know that adverbs are the plague of writers everywhere. But I am not of the mind that adverbs can never be used. I think, used purposefully, they can be useful shortcuts when the “show, don’t tell” would otherwise slow things down.
When I started rereading Harry Potter as an adult, I realized that J.K. Rowling is wild about adverbs after dialogue tags. I find that I don’t really mind. The way she uses them works for me, because if I’m 200 pages into an 800-page novel, I’d rather she got to the point instead of spending twenty extra words to describe just how hysterical Hermione sounded.
Roy Peter Clark urges to use them only to change the meaning of the verb:
To understand the difference between a good adverb and a bad adverb, consider these two sentences: “She smiled happy” and “She smiled sadly.” Which one works best? The first seems weak because “smiled” contains the meaning of “happily.” On the other hand, “sadly” changes the meaning.
Writing Tools by Roy Peter Clark
Do I think you should use adverbs all over the place? No, because it does reach a point where it’s just lazy and you lose engagement from your reader because you’re telling them everything instead of showing them. Don’t lean on adverbs just because you don’t want the mental effort of thinking of anything better. So be aware, be smart.
3) Trim the trimmings: “Kill your darlings.”
Learning to identify the bloat in your writing immediately improves the quality of it.
For example, the original sentence was “Learning to identify where you’re bloating in your writing will immediately improve the quality of it.” I condensed “where you’re bloating” to “the bloat” and struck “will.”
When a professor told me my story’s style contained a lot of excessive words, my defense was, “But that’s just the character’s voice!”
Veteran short story writers know how that conversation went. You can always find words to cut. Ask yourself the use of each word and if there’s a way it can be said simpler. We aren’t here to waste a reader’s time. Put in the work so they don’t have to.
You’re making the big swan into a little swan; you aren’t cutting the topiary down. Get a writing partner or critique group to help you with this. It’s one of the hardest things to do as a writer.
4) Read your writing aloud.
You may be shaking your head in determined defiance at this idea, but consider the possibility that it helps and that it can help you.
I was once in your skeptical shoes. “How is that going to help? I know what it’s supposed to sound like, so I’ll read it the way it’s supposed to be read!” Or, more vainly, “I hate the sound of my own voice!”
To the first, this is mostly true. If you’ve gone over a draft a hundred times, your familiarity with the text will come through when you read it. But don’t underestimate the power of your mouth. Your mouth is a thousand times more sensitive to rhythm than the little voice in your head.
It’s even better if you read it to someone. Having someone there who doesn’t know the context and who isn’t familiar with the text doubles the likelihood of catching strange rhythms, sounds, and confusing bits. It especially helps locating those troublesome, lurking long sentences (which I myself am particularly fond of). The physical input of breath and muscle will give your editing arsenal more depth.
And to the second, you don’t have to read it to your entire graduating class. Wait until everyone’s asleep and whisper it to yourself by the light of your phone if that’s what it takes.
5) Identify and diversify your crutch words.
We all have a collection of words that we lean on more than others, that we turn to when we can’t think of any other way of putting it.
The extremely talented Alexis Henderson, my critique partner, loves the word “keen.” Sarah J. Maas uses the word “spear” in her Court of Thorns and Roses series like there’s no tomorrow. My current WiP drags the word “unbidden” out of me quite a bit.
Start focusing on the words you keep coming back to, that you find yourself using often. You may not notice them; this is where a critique partner is handy, because odds are somebody else has noticed them. (Alexis, for example, wasn’t aware of her obsession with the word “keen” until I pointed it out.)
Crutch words aren’t inherently bad, and use them to your heart’s content while you’re drafting, but be on the lookout as you’re editing, because they’ll make your writing seem contrived.
I hope this was helpful! Do you have your own writing improvement tips?
…a picture hung on the wall with a two-inch wide border, gilded and rippled like a starburst, framing a black and white overhead sketch of a bumblebee
…the top of a brown, wooden bookcase
…on the far left, a golden cage that holds a bouquet of soft pink fake feathers
…a geometric vase with the bottom two-thirds painted gold with a texture like the inside of a steel drum, pounded over and over again with a hammer
…a stack of five World Book encyclopedias (G, H, B, and I), spines a muted burgundy, the title gold
…a pair of golden swans, one on top of the encyclopedias, neck arched as if looking down on its partner, which sits on the top of the bookcase below the other, its neck tilted as if in awe or servitude
…over the bottom swan’s shoulder are two long, slender black candles, their bases cylindrical and painted a dark blue-black with silver-gold bowls to catch the wax, one taller than the other
…they rest inside a shallow wooden tray painted a uniform seashell orange pink on the outside, black on the inside
…in the tray next to the candles is a globe, the golden continents glistening against the black seas, Africa facing front
Today’s prompt was pancakes / lilies / blue
Today’s response is different because sometimes it takes trying something different to give your creative well time to refill. For me, it helps to practice basic writing concepts, like noticing and describing details.
I enjoyed this exercise. Details are the things that make your story pop, so it’s always good to keep that skill sharp.
Tomorrow’s prompt is a free day!
If you’d like to join me and my writing friend, John Mastro, in our 30 Day Restart Challenge as we stretch our muscles before our MFA residency, check out the prompt list here and comment with a link to your response!